One Simple Act That Can Improve Your Relationship? Set Goals

Do you feel like you’re stuck in a relationship rut? Like you just don’t know what to do? Like nothing ever gets better?

We’ve have had countless clients tell them similar-sounding stories. And it makes sense. When things are going badly and you’re stuck in the middle of it, seeing a positive path forward can be difficult.

But research has uncovered a way to get people to feel better about their relationships that is shockingly simple. What do you need to do? Set relationship goals together.

Can it really be that easy? According to the findings, the answer is yes! The mere act of sitting down and creating goals made a huge difference in how people felt about their relationship.


Because they were working towards something better. They had something to get excited about. And they were sharing a goal.

What Kinds of Relationship Goals Should You and Your Partner Set?

Realistic ones. You want to set goals you can see positive progress on and eventually reach.

That doesn’t mean you can’t set a big goal. By all means, start saving up for that trip around the world if it’s in your budget! But don’t get too wild with your goal-setting. The key is to avoid unrealistic goals that will end up leaving you feeling disappointed and frustrated.

That’s why smaller is often better. More date nights. Taking a class together. Speaking each others’ love language at least twice a day.

Why are smaller goals better?

Because it’s much easier to achieve them. That means you’re more likely to keep working at them and feel empowered when they become a reality. And that will make both of you feel better about your place in life — and about each other.

Want to create an even deeper connection? Reach out to Oregon marriage counselors Norene Gronsiewski and Tim Higdon for relationship counseling.